I asked Weboy, for a subject to write about. He gave me ‘from sub side to Domme side’ It certainly gave me something to think about. Writing from my point of view. My sub side. Is my love of being spanked & my Domme side is more to do with my personality. Spanking to me is all about pleasure from pain. As a Domme? As I said. That comes more from my personality. I am not wired to be bossed around, controlled, or trained by my Dom. The same goes for not wanting to be a bossy b**ch to some man. Or a woman comes to think of it…Hm?
I can hear the words ‘You are a superb sub’…’You are very submissive indeed’…’You are very submissive in play’ The person who said that was my then-Dom. He knew me the best. I am interested in how our minds work. I have been accused of being a paradox before now. Mainly because I was a sub, not into being Dommed. Which maybe is a paradox…
I can the words ‘You are a switch, luv’ & I’m thinking, but am I though? Then. What does it matter? Just go with the flow. Do what feels right to me at that moment in time. Contradictory or not. It is all about pleasure & fun, after all. I suppose my submissive side comes naturally to me. Because of how men react to me. Men enjoyed playing with me & vice versa.
I knew what I wanted, loved, enjoyed, and got the most pleasure from & I knew what I didn’t want. I enjoyed my limits being pushed, but by someone, I had a connection with. Someone I could trust not to go too far when I eventually went into subspace. Which I often did. As a Domme. Could I have the confidence to go that far? Do men go into subspace? They must do, at some time. I am now realising that I have questions. Lots of questions. A lot I want to learn…
My sub side is experienced, know my mind. My Domme side is there as my personality but need to learn more. Though some might say that would be Domming from the bottom. So my Domme side needs to evolve further than I am Domme because I am not submissive. Even though I love being spanked. Many years ago. Someone sent me a message telling me that I was not a real submissive. My response to that. Was to tell them that someone had their collar done up to tight…
I do feel that no one has the to attack another person for what they are into. Each to their own. It comes down to manners and respect. Being rude to another person is not being ‘Domme’ The last time I went to an event. With my friend. There was a Domme there, with her two male subs. I liked & admired the way she behaved. She was respectful. Yes, she was torturing, and humiliating them, but they were enjoying it. Could I do that to a man? Torture him, humiliate him? All without the loud, bitchy, nasty voice…Hm? Yes. I am quiet. I don’t do loud…
I remember at one of my home parties. Me & my friend. In my bedroom. With our Tv friend. Well, it started with spanking. Except my friend doing the spanking yelped more as she spanked him than he did. We still laugh about that. It ended when I poured hot candle wax onto his bottom. Then I suggested to my friend where else we could pour the wax. He quickly turned over. He knew exactly what I had in mind. By the time I was finished he was completely covered in candle wax. It took him a while in the bathroom afterwards…
I know my Domme side is there & I can have so much fun, giving pleasure…but being softly spoken. My Domme side does not have a bossy, dominating voice. It is more in my actions than my voice. My sub-side is not dissimilar. Hence not being into role play, or being a brat.
Thank you for the writing prompt Weboy. You have given me lots to think about…